What I Wish People Knew About Life With Anxiety
Photo courtesy of Eliza Florendo.
On the very first day of my very first internship, I was 20 minutes late. I stood a few blocks away from the downtown New York City office, breathing heavily, tears streaming down my face. Riding the 6 train from 77th Street to Canal Street, I had been completely fine. But now, I was having a panic attack.
I've prepared myself for this. It's just an internship. It will be fine, I kept telling myself.
But as soon as I stepped on the platform and started walking, my heart began to feel as though it was beating out of my chest, and breathing became difficult. I was trying to take big breaths, but it felt like I was breathing through a straw. Dizziness overcame me. My mouth began to salivate, and I felt like I was going to be sick. Nothing around me had even changed -- there was no trigger. I wasn't in danger. Everything was fine around me. And everyone seemed to be, too. I should have felt fine. But that's not the way anxiety works.
I had been in this situation before. I had experienced dozens of panic attacks throughout my life -- that's just what living with anxiety (or more specifically, generalized anxiety disorder) is like. It didn't matter where I was, who I was with, or what I was doing. Once I felt it creeping up, there was no way back. But how do you possibly explain that to your new boss on your first day at a fashion magazine? You can't. What I had been afraid of for weeks was actually happening. And it felt like I had only myse...
Source: Healthy Living - The Huffington Post - Category: Consumer Health News Source Type: news
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