When Holidays Hurt

At certain times of the year, families and friends gather to eat, exchange gifts, celebrate favorite traditions and generally catch up with each other. The atmosphere changes as businesses close, churches hold special services, and retailers tempt shoppers with sales. Decorations and lights are put up everywhere in an effort to spark holiday spirit, before the cold and darkness of winter sets in. It does seem to be a kinder season, in many ways, but it is also a season when conflict, loneliness, and loss can hold a sharper edge.  Expectations (yours or those other people set forth) might be high at a time when you feel you just can’t face them anymore. For a lot of reasons, you might dread traditional strife and remember only past or present disappointments. Maybe you feel trapped, as if you cannot take care of your own needs if you fulfill the desires of others. Maybe this year is different because you have lost someone important and need the world around you to stand still for a while. Stress and grief change everything, and holidays are no exception. Certainly, the days that we hope will bring love and forgiveness into our hearts are often difficult to navigate. Does it have to stay that way? No, it doesn’t. Using coping strategies can help, things that anyone can do. They are not expensive; they do not require extreme effort. They are, rather, the actions and ideas that hold true to the best concept of togetherness: kindness, love, forgiveness, and joy. Even if you a...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Family Holiday Coping dissapointment grief Guilt Holidays Resentment Shame Thanksgiving Source Type: blogs