When Structure and Supervision Become Barriers to Child Development: 3 Important Ideas for Parenting Young Children

Structure and supervision are important principles in raising healthy, curious, and connected children. But when these become too rigid, anxiousness and inflexibility begin to seep into a child’s developing mind. Structure provides a framework for expectations, and about how time and the day flow. But much like a house, the space defined by the structure is where the magic of “home,” relationship, and learning happens. The same holds true for supervision. Monitoring and guiding are important parental responsibilities. Safety matters and a secure base is what a child holds in mind as he or she explores and widens their sense of self, relationships, and how the world works. But strict and rigid supervision does not allow for autonomy and intrinsic exploration, and over time a child learns to wait to be told what to do and how to do it. When this happens, key developmental conditions are supervised out of the exploration process and the skills of creativity, taking initiative, problem-solving, frustration tolerance, and risk-taking suffer accordingly. Notably, over time these skills develop into personal qualities and are hallmarks of success in each stage of life. The challenge is balancing the need for control. When we think too much in terms of behavior rather than development, parents gain a sense of control by emphasizing the management aspect. This may feel “on course” but behavior management is only one side of the developmental equation of continuity and change...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Children and Teens Parenting Authoritarian Parenting authoritative parenting Autonomy Child Development Learning Source Type: blogs