Personal Statment... exchange/help

So I've been drafting my PS for two months now and still feel like it's missing something. I have hit the key points, but I still feel like it needs a little more oomph. (Besides the fact that I have over 150 words.) I could really use another set of eyes and would be glad to do the same.
Source: Student Doctor Network - Category: Universities & Medical Training Authors: Source Type: forums