Spouses Who Volunteer Create Awesome Marriages

You cannot love someone maturely and try to control him (or her). The behaviors of both partners should be voluntary. As you discuss the kind of life you want to have together, focus on what really fits for you. Ideally, before marriage, you will discuss how you would like to handle money, chores and responsibilities, parenting (or step-parenting) concerns, if applicable, where you want to live, and so on. Do Not Agree to an Unreasonable Demand   Some people, eager to tie the knot, will agree to a demand, request, or assumption that doesn’t fit for them. A man says that the deal is off unless you agree to move to my city, have a relative live with the two of you, have a kind of wedding that is very different from what you had in mind, or to something else. If you’re tempted to give in because you so want to marry him, ask yourself, “Am I really okay about this? Might I resent him later if I now let him push me into doing something that goes against the grain for me?” If you notice yourself trying to manipulate a prospective or actual spouse into doing something your way, back off. No good will come from coercing someone into doing something that’s not congruent with his personality. Your objective should be respectful collaboration, with each of you choosing freely, whatever you agree to do. If over time, one of you is consistently giving — or giving in — much more than the other, your relationship will probably suffer from the imbalance. In a good f...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Ethics & Morality Family Marriage and Divorce Men's Issues Relationships Self-Help Women's Issues Communication Compromise Cooperation Generosity Give and take Intimacy Marital Bliss Resentment Sacrifice Teamwork values Source Type: blogs