Expectations vs. Abilities

Sometimes expectations exceed abilities. But the real problem is when other people ' s expectations of me exceed my abilities. For example, last week we saw family friends and agreed we need to make it an annual event. It was suggested to me, actually I was told, that we should alternate hosting and my husband and I should host next year.Um, that doesn ' t work for me.I have major limitations on what I can and can ' t do. I do not go out much at night because I get too tired. We don ' t entertain much again because I get too tired. Or end up in pain.No I am not meeting for drinks at 9pm. I am going to be in bed by then. No I am not going for a little walk because you want to. But we could go out and have a cup of coffee or you could come here and we could have tea. Anytime we plan on doing something, there always have to be an out - can I cancel at any time because I need a nap or to lie down.I am learning to manage my expectations regarding my abilities, but it is clear I need to learn better how to manage other people ' s expectations.When I worked, I was a big fan of managing up. This is where you train your manager to understand what you do well and what you are like. It is clear I need to learn to manage my friends and family. No one more trip down or upstairs is not what I am about to do anytime soon. Nor, once I have said I am exhausted, I am not going to stick around for another cup of tea. I am heading home to lie down.I feel like a recording when I keep saying ' no ...
Source: Caroline's Breast Cancer Blog - Category: Cancer & Oncology Tags: exhaustion family fatigue friends Source Type: blogs