How Making Sacrifices For A Partner — Or Saying You Will — Affects Wellbeing

By Emma Young You were hoping to go out with friends on Saturday night, but your partner really wants to have a quiet night at home instead… Your life’s going great, but then your partner is offered their dream job in a town you’d happily never visit, let alone live in… So what do you do? Do you stand your ground? Or you do you sacrifice your own goals for the sake of your partner’s? It’s a dilemma familiar to anyone who’s ever been in a relationship. It would seem reasonable, then, to assume that research could tell us what the likely impacts would be on individual wellbeing, and on the health of the relationship itself. However, as the authors of a new paper published in Psychological Bulletin point out, there are two conflicting hypotheses for how sacrifices should pan out. The “benefit hypothesis” holds that making sacrifices can relieve tension in a relationship and help to build a climate of trust and cooperation. According to the “burden hypothesis”, however, when one partner sacrifices a personal goal, and compromises on their autonomy, their own wellbeing takes a hit. Francesca Righetti at the Free University of Amsterdam led work that set out to look at what actually happens. And the results are fascinating: if you feel that you would in theory be willing to make a sacrifice for your partner, there are benefits for you both. However, when one person actually makes a sacrifice (not just says that ...
Source: BPS RESEARCH DIGEST - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Emotion Sex Social Source Type: blogs
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