Giving Your Partner the Right Kind of Support in Troubled Times

Why backing off (for a bit) may be better for your relationship. Attention, married women: If your husband seems angst-ridden or huffy, you might want to hold off on the advice in favor of a simple hug. And guys, despite how it may bruise your ego, you’ve got to continue being attentive even when your wife cruelly shoots down your attempts at making her feel better. According to a series of 2010 studies published by the University of Iowa, an excess of incorrectly-expressed support is worse for your marriage than neglect — shocking, right? A related study showed that husbands were more satisfied when they received the “right” kind of encouragement, while wives were content to receive ANY kind of help during a time of need. Wives With This Type Of Husband Have Happier Marriages, Study Says Just what is the “right” type of support, though? The UI study, which followed 103 married heterosexual couples over the course of five years, pinpointed four different types of support: Emotional and physical support (listening, hugging, sympathizing). Informational support (giving advice, collecting information). Self-esteem support (pep talks). Tangible support (doing chores, figuring out solutions to problems). Surveys showed that informational support, especially in the form of unsolicited counsel, may not always be well-received, while sincere encouragement was basically failproof. We suppose that’s common sense for anybody; how would you like i...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Publishers Relationships YourTango Emotional Support informational support self-esteem support tangible support Source Type: blogs