Wait, Other People Don ’ t Think about Suicide?

The most startling thing I’ve heard in my life is that not everyone thinks about suicide every day. Or now and then. Or even once in a long while. Can that be? I heard this from a co-worker a while ago. We were collaborating on a dreary project, and I joked about it being the kind of work that makes you want to kill yourself and what a relief that would be. “I know, right?” I expected her to say. Instead, she chuckled uncomfortably, then asked if I really thought that way. When I said yes, she was taken aback and a little disbelieving. “You never have?” I asked. “Of course not!” I was taken aback. And a little disbelieving. Is it possible that someone who has trod life’s hard ground for 40-plus years has never felt pain, loss, despair, failure, or disconnection sufficient even to have considered hastening the inevitable? Apparently so. Who knew? Not I. Not a day has gone by in the past 50 years in which I haven’t given some thought to hastening my own inevitable. It’s usually just a fleeting mental image, one item in the endless river of junk thoughts that flow through my mind at any given moment, along with looking both ways when crossing the street, an image of dinner and, as always, sex. At times it’s escalated to rumination, and a few times rumination has given way to war gaming some key details: method; logistics; review of life insurance policy for a suicide exclusion; impact on survivors. And that&r...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Personal Suicide Depression Suicidal Thoughts Source Type: blogs

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