I Forgot What? Healing Through Memories

A couple of weeks ago, my external life took a back seat to my internal life. Although my external life is pretty good these days, my internal life is pretty ugly. It is a series of traumatic experiences with emotions to match. When it is time to pay attention to the internal life, it means my childhood memories are coming back. And I had better pay attention. I had better be ready for some depression, some sadness, some anger that rivals a toddler’s tantrums, some anxiety and some intense exhaustion. Needless to say, the external life starts to slow down a bit. Don’t get me wrong, the basic stuff still happens. The kids eat. They go to school. I go to work. But phone calls get missed. The emails pile up. And obviously, the writing just doesn’t happen. There are entire nights of staring at the wall. There are a lot of naps. There are many self-care visits to therapeutic practitioners. Over the years, I have learned what it takes to face the memories. These coping mechanisms are critical to my recovery. If I don’t do them, there will be one result. I will get sick. I will get so sick that there will be no external life. Everything will stop. And as a single mother, that is simply not an option. The latest memories are intense. As my coping mechanisms get stronger, so do the emotions I must address. These memories are clarifying a few things. First and foremost, I am accidentally alive. I already thought that. But now I know it for certain. The number of times I c...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatrists and Psychologists Authors: Tags: Anger Brain and Behavior Caregivers Children and Teens Depression Disorders Family General Grief and Loss Memory and Perception Mental Health and Wellness Parenting Personal PTSD Self-Esteem Self-Help Depression (mood) Em Source Type: blogs