Keeping Anxiety at Bay: My Arsenal of Recovery

Looking back on my childhood, there was never really a time I wasn’t unsure of myself. I never thought I was cute enough, smart enough, funny enough or fun enough. In fact, I doubted that any of my playmates actually liked me. On my birthday, I wondered whether my friends would actually show up to my party. And if they did, was it because my parents paid them to come? If so, how much? How much was I worth? Decades later, I realize this was one of the first indications that I suffered from anxiety. Through countless hours of therapy, research and reflection, I have come to understand the many manifestations of anxiety and the strength of its control. I have also come to accept it as I would any other disease — with patience, understanding and a stubborn determination to overcome it. I spent much of my childhood suffering from an ailment that I didn’t know existed, and that even today, many misunderstand. I wondered why I incessantly worried about my house burning down, or my mother leaving me, or a man in windowless white van snatching me up and taking me away forever. My first real airplane trip, at age 9, was to visit my grandmother on the other side of the country. I was excited leading up to the trip, but the minute I walked into the airport a violent wave of nausea came over me. My skin broke out in a dappled crimson rash, my breath became shallow, my heart began racing, my limbs grew weak and my stomach seized with horrible cramps. I raced to the bathroom an...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Anxiety and Panic Medications Personal Psychotherapy Self-Esteem Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Hypertension overwhelm Panic Attack Paranoia Psychology self-worth Suffering Worry Source Type: blogs