Surprise Diagnoses

When I was diagnosed with PTSD at the beginning of the year, it came as a surprise to me. I’d gone to this psychologist for a potential BPD diagnosis. I walked out with not only that, but four years’ worth of PTSD as well. It was surprising because in these four years I’d not once thought about this disorder; it never even occurred to me. But as I thought about it, letting it sink in, things started making sense. And since the diagnosis, I’ve had to think about what happened. Because I really didn’t deal with it; I’m still having trouble figuring out where to go from here. I know it could’ve been much worse. Others have had it so much worse than me. But I’m trying to stop that way of thinking. What happened was awful and it did change me. It does me more harm than good to invalidate my own feelings. February 2012, I was 18 and had been living on my own in Toronto for seven months or so. One morning I was followed. The bus stop was right across from my apartment building. I noticed him waiting for the bus and he gave me this smile that sent a chill up my spine. I didn’t want to be rude, so I quickly, barely, smiled back. I noticed him get closer to me as we stood waiting for the bus. My gut was immediately telling me something was off about him. And as he stared at me from across the bus, my heart was pounding. It’s funny how when your intuition is telling you something’s wrong, even when you’re surrounded by other people which usually would m...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: Anxiety and Panic Borderline Personality Bullying Children and Teens College Disorders General PTSD Trauma Violence and Aggression battery bpd Panic Attack Posttraumatic Stress Disorder Rape Sexual Assault Sexual Trauma s Source Type: blogs