7 Ways to Become More Comfortable Being with Ourselves

So many of us have a hard time being alone with ourselves. Which is why we have a few glasses of wine when we’re the only one at home. It’s why we try not to be home by ourselves. It’s why we like to stay busy. It’s why we turn to all sorts of substances; anything not to think or feel or sit with ourselves. Because, as clinical psychologist Carolyn Ferreira, Psy.D, said, “When we are still with our own thoughts and feelings, there is always the possibility that those thoughts and feelings will go to a place that we don’t like.” That place might be a conflict at work, a rocky relationship, a bad memory. We might realize that we are actually dreading a date with our partner. We might realize we really need to change careers. Becoming aware of these thoughts may mean that we need a change — in ourselves or in our circumstances, and these changes may be difficult to make, said psychologist Christine Selby, Ph.D. Many of us simply aren’t “wired” to be with ourselves, she noted. More than 50 percent of people are extroverts, who “derive psychological energy from being around others.” For them “being ‘forced’ to be alone with one’s thoughts and feelings may be so foreign and so draining that they will look for interactions with others any chance they can get.” Of course, sometimes, distracting ourselves is necessary and totally OK. Being with our thoughts and feelings for a long time gets exhausting, Selby said. However, self-destruct...
Source: World of Psychology - Category: Psychiatry & Psychology Authors: Tags: General Habits Happiness Mental Health and Wellness Mindfulness Personality Psychology Relationships Self-Esteem Self-Help Stress Success & Achievement Being alone Carolyn Ferreira Christine Selby Clinical Psychology Cognit Source Type: blogs